It started out as a normal Sunday morning, I woke later than planned but was able to make my way to church just fine. In the middle of service, just after receiving communion, I received a text message. Normally I wouldn’t check my phone but it caught me off guard buzzing on the open seat next to me because there’s typically no service in the school building we hold our service at and normally I wouldn’t even receive said text in the first place until I was heading out to my car. I notice it’s from my mom, go ahead and open it and it reads, “Looks like I’m taking Dad to the hospital. Will call you later.” Now I think the average person’s response (and probably the right one) if they were in the same situation, would be to quietly get up out of their seat and make their way outside to try and find out more. I mean the service was almost over anyways, there was only a short time of prayer and a few more hymns left. But something told me to stay, and I immediately thought to myself, you know, there is no better time to receive news like this than when you’re in the midst of worshiping the one true God. So I stayed seated, tried my best to orient my heart and mind towards heaven and finished out the service. I even stayed after the service to help pack up the church (like I said we meet in the basement of a school and were packing up earlier than normal as due to inclement weather we weren’t going to have Sunday school). While interacting with those around me I answered the typical question of how are you with ‘doing well’, even when my mind was scattered and elsewhere.
When I finally made my way out of the building, I contacted my mom to try and find out what was going on. I learned that earlier in the morning, my father had began complaining of a tightness of chest, a sudden sore throat and others around him had noticed his skin was becoming very pale. With all of that, the decision was made to dial 911 and get him to a hospital as soon as possible. At that point I asked if she wanted me to come to be with them, but because they had not received any results from the tests that had been done and the inclement weather, my mom commanded that I go home instead. In immediate outburst, I cried out “My dad’s in the hospital and you’re telling me to go home?” After I hung up the phone, I sat in the car unsure of what to do. I then asked myself, I wonder what’s more honoring to my parents, to listen and obey my mother’s request and go home, or act in defiance and come to the aid of my father going through this trial.
By God’s grace, in attempt to respect my mother’s wishes, I chose the former and made my way home. As I pulled up to the house, I sat there debating my decision for a good five minutes. It was then that this song came up on my Ipod. The tears came streaming down. Regardless of what was happening, if my Dad were going to enter into glory or recover just fine, God was right there with both of us, and His love would not fail either way. I finally had the strength to get out of the car and begin the waiting game.
I spent the next two hours anxiously sitting on the couch letting my mind wander to extremes calling my mom every half an hour looking for any information I could. And when that amounted to nothing, I finally accepted my fate and began to calm myself down. I then used the time to do my daily devotions, seeking the Lord through His word and bringing my heart before Him in prayer, and now I find myself writing this blog.
During my devotion time I was reminded of who God is, His purposes, the brevity of life, the fact that He is our refuge and strength, and that He will be with us through it all. We never know when God is going to call us home, but we do know that in the little time He has given us we are called to spend it for His glory. We also know that suffering is a normal part of this life because of the sinful state of this world, but the fact of the matter is that God uses it according to His purposes and for the good of those who love Him. In the ultimate act of suffering, Jesus Christ came down from heaven and died on the cross, taking the punishment for our sin and experiencing separation from the Father. All of this was done so that through His resurrection we can now die to ourselves and find new life in Him.
Currently my Dad is spending the night at a Kaiser Permanente getting some blood tests done and will have more done later tonight so the doctors will be able to compare the results. Tomorrow he will see a cardiologist and also undergo a stress test, which will most likely lead to some lifestyle changes. But as of right now, no one is under the impression it is immediately life threatening, so praise God for that.
Thankfully this time around it was just a scare. Although with that being said, just hours after all of this has occurred, I can already see how God is using this in my own personal walk with Him and I hope that it can be an encouragement to yours as well. Also, I am thankful for and encouraged by all of you who have been praying for my family on this hectic day, it is truly a wonderful blessing to see and know that so many people are supporting us. And as always, thanks for reading!
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