One. Day. At. A. Time.

Well, it’s been just about a week since I expressed (in a painfully honest manner) the lackluster experience of my first month of post grad life. So today, I would like to bring you an update of sorts. First and foremost, let me express the fact that anything “I” have done is because of Christ (and the Holy Spirit, the whole Trinity really). It was the Holy Spirit who opened my eyes to the pit of sin I had fallen in and caused me to cry out to the Father, and Christ who interceded for me making me righteous in the Fathers sight, declaring me forgiven. And second, I would like to say that this is probably going to be a long drawn out process. While His forgiveness is effective immediately, the path of sanctification is a long one. Some days it will feel like I’m sprinting straight into the arms of Christ, taking long strides towards the man of God I seek to be. Others, I’m going to completely fall off the path, run in the wrong direction and seemingly lose all progress, only to be rescued by our gracious Father and placed back on. But most days are going to be slow paced, in a two steps forward one step back with a stumble here and there kind of fashion. Like that of a baby taking his first steps heading towards his father on the other side of the room who is graciously and excitedly calling out to him. Only this baby has his older brother right there beside him, guiding him the whole time, not so close to not let the baby fall, but enough to be right there to pick him up when he does. Though (at risk of mixing the analogies) sometimes that fall really does hurt, and there we are, tangled up in the weeds of life. At that time the father tells the older brother to let us stay there, and so we go on, feeling alone and deserted, crawling inch by inch with blood on our knees crying out, only for our eyes to clear and the storm to pass. It is then we see that we have gone much further than any time before, the ground we're standing on now is ten times more solid than it has ever been, and to our amazement, our brother was still there guiding us as well. Anyways, all of that was to simply say, this is not something that will immediately change, and through the help of the Holy Spirit and Christ, as time goes on I hope to move, slowly as may be, further and further along the path of sanctification each day.

In the days since that post, I have been able to start taking steps in the right direction. Firstly, God has granted me the grace to dive into his word every day since then, where I am making my way through the psalms, reflecting on a chapter of proverbs a day, and reading Paul’s letter to the Colossians each day as well.  Through that, and this is a brief way of putting it, I have been learning all about the majesty of God (the psalms), seeking the way of wisdom (proverbs), seeing all that God has done for us through Christ, the preeminence of Christ, the uselessness of self made religion, and how then we should live in reality of what God has done (Colossians). I have also been able to cut out a good chunk of time for my prayer journaling as well.

Second I have finally been able to dive into some books that I would like to read. I am currently two chapters away from finishing Voddie Baucham’s What He Must Be (if he would like to marry my daughter), where I have been learning all about the godly qualities that I must possess if I would like to be a fit husband one day (which by the way, I am fairly certain extreme laziness is NOT on that list, and is in fact warned against). I am halfway done with The Fellowship of the Ring (which technically means I have finished a book!), and I am making slow but sure process through JMAC’s One Perfect Life, which is more so an act of scholarship tying the story of the 4 gospels together in such a way that tells the complete story of Christ, and thus it is essentially more scripture that I am reading.

Thirdly, I have taken steps towards reorienting my schedule to that of a more normal human being. This process has actually been pretty tough, it has required fighting off desires to take naps in the late afternoon/evening, there have been some extremely late nights where I’ve lied wide awake in my bed, and the will it takes to force myself out of bed at a decent time in the morning (right now I am aiming at 10) is astounding, which sometimes I’ve failed. But hopefully this one will change quickly as training for the summer camp I’m working begins next week, and we need to be there no later than 8am. Just so you know this is the same summer camp I worked last year for children with special needs, but this time around I am going to be a Group Coordinator, meaning I’m overseeing a whole classroom (and technically a second one ran by the assistant group coordinator) instead of being a counselor specifically paired with a child. Though not a full time job this camp is something I loved immensely, and had a strong desire to return to (as a side note, it is yet another item I can put on the resume). 

Finally, I’ve been doing whatever I can to try and get out of the house. Like before, some of that time has been through church (though I missed this past Sunday because of father’s day) and visiting with friends. On top of that, each day I have tried to add a 20-30 minute walk to my schedule, and say yes whenever my parents have asked if I’d like to come along with them (for whatever errand it is). My dad and I were even able to get out and play some golf, which was a wonderful time we got to spend together. Any fresh air I can get has been a great help to the process of renewing my mind and reawakening my heart that began with the first step, God allowing His Scriptures to take hold in my life and using them to further conform me to the image of His son. 

Some things I’d like to add to the process are getting into a serious work out routine and diving into the job search with far a greater diligence than I have shown, but I am extremely thankful for the small steps that God has allowed me to take. Like I said earlier this process will more than likely be a slow one, so if you can continue to be praying for me that would be greatly appreciated, for those prayers are highly coveted and have far more of an effect than we will ever realize. As always, thanks for sticking around and reading all the way through, it means a lot! If you feel so inclined, shoot me a message (any way you see fit) and let me know how I can be praying for you as well!